ADHD and Lying: What’s the Deal?

If you have a child with ADHD who tells frequent lies, you’re not alone. Like other moms out there, you may be wondering if there’s something inherently wrong with your kid.

Perhaps you’ve tried every discipline strategy in the book, but nothing’s working and you don’t know what to do the next time it happens.

Don’t panic, Friend.  In today’s episode, I talk all about ADHD, lying and how to get kids to tell the truth. 

Specifically, I speak to one worried mom about why her kid is always lying.

What Does An ADHD Parent Do?

So why do ADHD children have such a difficult time telling the truth?

And how do parents and other family members help them learn to do the right thing?

Be Your Child’s Safe Place Always

The first step no matter what? Be your child’s safe place.

I cannot begin to tell you how critical it is for parents to be a safe place for their children. This is especially important when your child is an outside-the-box thinker.

Our world is not kind to those who receive and process the world differently. And ADHD kids are often at the receiving end of messages telling them that there’s something wrong with them.

It’s essential that your child knows that you’re a safe place to go to in order to process through the stresses of life. When this is the case, they’ll be better equipped to face the dragons in the real world.

How To Get ADHD Kids To Tell The Truth

So today, I’m talking about why kids with ADHD lie.

And here’s the thing. Lying isn’t limited to kids with attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD).

Yes, one symptom of ADHD is lying. But many who struggle with executive functions such as flexible thinking, planning and impulse control often have a hard time telling the truth.

ADHD & Lying is A Common Scenario

The bottom line is that a common symptoms of ADHD is lying.

Now this doesn’t mean that you have an inherently dishonest child who’s doomed to a life of malicious lies.

Not in the slightest.

In fact, even your child’s little white lies are clues that can help you help your child overcome frequent lying.

And that’s where parents and family members can help.

Get to The Root of It

I’m convinced that one of the the best things to deal with your child’s lying is to help your child overcome the root issues behind that lying habit.

Some of those root issues include:

  • low self-esteem
  • impulse issues
  • what some term magical thinking (what I believe is one of the potential strengths of the creative kid)
  • and other mental health issues

For more information on magical thinking, check out this post at ADDitude Magazine.

Changing the Trajectory For ADHD Kids

In addition to specific tips about ADHD kids who lie, today I’m sharing the mission behind, A Heart For All Students including why I want you to join me.

The ultimate mission is to change the life trajectory for our kids who dare to be different.

I’m talking about the kids with:

  • ADHD
  • Autism
  • Sensory processing disorder issues
  • Oppositional defiant disorder traits
  • Anxiety disorder traits
  • Learning Differences
  • Self esteem issues
  • Those who don’t fit the mold (diagnosis or not)
dishonest kid fingers crossed behind back

Kids Who Lie, Lie For A Reason (ADHD or Not)

As mentioned earlier, it’s those with executive functioning challenges who often develop a pattern of lying

As a default self-protective mechanism, they lie to protect themselves. 

Again, these kids are constantly told they’re doing, saying, or being “wrong”, naturally they learn to protect themselves.

For more on that, read Parenting Neurodiverse Kids To Thrive.

So how do we help kids who lie- whether they have ADHD or not? 

Parenting Kids With ADHD & Autism In Community

When I was in the thick of my son’s most horrific behaviors, I felt so alone. And now that I’m on the other side, I’ve come to realize so much.

Number one is that moms need safe a community to lift them up when they have to make decisions that the MIL or the neighbor don’t approve of.

In order for us to change the long-term outcomes for our outside-the-box children, we need to change the conversation.

boy crouched in shame for lying

Traditional Parenting Paradigm Destroys

By the grace of God, I’ve learned so much about how and why the traditional parenting paradigm can be so destructive.

I want to share what I’ve learned with you and then I want you to share with me.

And then what will happen is that you share with your friend.

Then that friend shares with another friend and eventually we create a collective of moms that are brave enough to do things differently.

We can work with our children now and equip them with what they need to thrive.

And then together, we can change the narrative for our kids and future generations.

Relationship First Even When Our Kids Lie

God tells us to love others and He does that through relationship.

And that’s how we need to parent our uniquely-wired kids.

Relationship first. Always.

How Do I Get My Kid To Stop Lying?

So why do our kids who have ADHD, Autism or other executive functioning issues lie so much?

Find out how to get your kid to stop lying, but more importantly, reach their heart.

Be encouraged!

Listen to episode 22 here!

Extra Support For Moms Raising Kids With ADHD

And don’t forget to grab the Free 5 Day Video Devotional Series For The Weary Christian Momma.

I’ll meet you in your inbox for 5 days of teaching and encouragement.

Then you’ll dive into the devotional and prayer journal to process it all with the Lord.

Be encouraged. There’s so much hope!!

Sign up for the 5 day video devotional series HERE.

description of video devotional series for special needs moms


Links And Resources From This Podcast

Select What You Want To Hear

In the above podcast player, you can use the episode chapter icon (bottom center) to select what you want to hear. Also you can use the pop up icon (far right) to share this podcast on social media or download it for later listening. Enjoy!

  • [01:31] When I First Started
  • [03:00] Need For Community
  • [04:42] Change The Directory
  • [06:11] Relationships Change People
  • [07:00] ADHD Kids And The Truth
  • [08:50] Fight, Flight Or Freeze Response
  • [12:15] Fighting Back
  • [12:55] Child Meltdowns

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